Memories of Jim

As many of you know, Matt's dad, Jim, passed away last week in a tragic car accident. We are so sad and shocked. His funeral was this past Monday and I had the chance to share a few memories of him. I thought I'd continue my tribute by attaching my comments here:

I love Jim and I would regret it if I didn't take this opportunity to express my respect and admiration.

Jim was a man who lived simply and took pleasure in simple things. I remember one conversation with him when he described one of the most delicious things he had ever eaten. It was a peach picked fresh from the tree. He told me how sweet and juicy it was - so juicy that when he bit into it, the juices ran down his arm all the way to his elbow. After he told me this, I decided that I would try to find him a peach like the one he described. I remember after one attempt he told me, "it was good, but the juices didn't reach my elbow." I love that he took pleasure in such a simple thing, and every time I buy a peach, I always think of Jim.

Another thing he took pleasure in was icy slurpee drinks from Sonic. Often on business trips, he treated himself to a Sonic icy and took a long drive in his nice, new rental car. He told Matt that driving in that nice car with his drink felt like a vacation.

Jim was a man who gave little thought to himself. I have fond memories of a time, eighteen months ago, when Jim flew out here specifically for the purpose of helping Matt and I move to our current home. He knew that I was sick and pregnant, and that we had just barely moved two months' previous. He wanted to make things easier for us and happily used his vacation days for that purpose.

My last conversation with Jim was when he called me to offer up a free plane ticket he had earned. I didn't want to take it, but he said, "it's a gift, and I wouldn't give it to you if I didn't want to."

Jim seemed to enjoy being "Grandpa Jim" or "Big Jim" as Josh taught Emmy to call him. He made it a point to be here for both Emmy and Sophie's blessing days. And they both enjoyed naps in his arms as infants. I am happy that at least for a short time, he was able to enter the pink world of little girls. Playing dress-up and baby dolls was a first for him, and he seemed to enjoy it. He was the kind of grandpa who would really get down on the ground and play. I found an email he wrote me a couple years ago, describing a few hours he spent with a two-and-a-half year old boy in his ward. I'll read you what he wrote, because I think it shows how he was with his own grandchildren:

"We crawled through cars in the garage, threw rock salt, chased birds, went down slides, had pillow fights, played hide and seek, went for a walk, ate dinner and that was all within two or three hours. It was a good learning experience for me. I now have more appreciation for moms."

When he was with Emmy, he seemed to look at the world through her eyes. He taught her to say "dog" and she remembers that when they would play dress-up, he would wear the fire man's hat. When Sophie is bigger, I will tell her about how her Grandpa Jim fed her chocolate cake when she was only 9 months old to keep her happy at Emmy's birthday party.

I always liked the sound of Jim's voice - kind and genuine. He would often ask me very thoughtful questions. He was always interested, always accepting and always sincere.

I admire Jim's tender heart. There was no question that he loved Matt, Dan, and Josh immensely. He didn't express his feelings often, because when he did, he would often become emotional. One Christmas, he made huge, involved, and thorough scrapbooks for each of his boys. What a treasure those books are. I don't know many dads who would take on such an endeavor.

Almost every time I said goodbye to Jim, his parting words were, "take good care of Matt." Even though Matt is an extremely independent-minded adult, Jim is still his father, and wants his son to be taken care of. I will do my best to honor his request.